Fork in the road

Its funny when you look back at some important moment in your life and wonder what would have happened *IF* you had done something differently.  Said this, done that.  Doesnt really matter at all, because it happened, nothing can change it short of a time machine.

There are other moments in your life.  Those moments where you *KNOW* there are consequences and reprecussions for your every thought and action.  What you do will set the tone in your life for a very long time.




I had one of those moments this weekend, the second one.  I stood on the edge of the abyss and had that rare moment of clarity.  I *KNEW* what I did and said next would make my life easier, or make my life more complicated.  It was like in the movie where crap was slowed down.  I was consious of each and every word I said.  Each thing I did.  I did feel a little 'out of body' like I was not there.  I really did not have a choice.  I could get crapped on, or stand up for what was right.  It would have been easier to just give up, take the easy path.  I made the conscious decision not out of pride, or some false sense of what is right for me, some guess what is best, but what was right for those who depend on me (even if they have no clue I am doing it all for them)

I look back and and can honesly say that I would do the same thing again, make the same choice, say the same things.  There really is only one path for your life, it is not clear now, but will be when you look back.  You have to live the consequences and suffer the repercussions of your good and bad decisions.






So much drama, or trauma in my life.  I have said before how I feel like I am living in some sitcom.  I have to modify that a little.  I feel like I am some farking life-time drama.  Like the 50's rocker said 'whys everybody always picking one me' I aint Charlie Brown!

I cant pick a cellphone provider, or a satellite\cable company without some issue.  The transfer of my cell from the old to the new takes a week.  I dont get the promised channels, but get twice the promised bill.  I sign up for wireless internet, and the signal doesnt work.  I buy a can of antifreeze from Target, when I go to put it in my car I find the bottle has been opened and its half full.  When I complain, I am accused of lying.  WTF??!!??
Sometimes I think I am cursed.  Sometimes I feel like I am a character in a Jim Carrey movie, the one what his whole life was on the teletube?



My father told me something long ago.  He said, the secret to making it through a march of any distance is to put one foot in front of the other.

Thats it.  Right, left. Farking right.

Its some fragrant bullshiat, but its also a good way to live your life.  Some of the best things in life are, lies?

Gonna get in step and make it through the next march.

Peace, out.